He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Randomize