Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize