It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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