did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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