My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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