went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
