I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
