Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize