This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
