Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
