The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
