is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
