You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
