I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
