Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize