i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
