1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
