You really coming over, don't trick.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
