Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
