You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
