How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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