Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
