I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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