making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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