The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
