Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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