i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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