She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
