Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
