Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
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