there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
