I think my vagina is haunted
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
