Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
