Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
