i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize