yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
