im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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