A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize