Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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