Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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