it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize