at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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