Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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