I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
We're hate flirting, damnit.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize