try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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