google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
