His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Even my vagina gasped.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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