Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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