This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
