how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
